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Under My Umbrella

Name - Fadzly B Azman
Age - 25

Want to know me contact me k?

Sky-writing

I Hate Me Myself And I

(Thought, quote, random musing of the day...)

Over the Summer...

Monday, September 06, 2004
Saturday, October 16, 2004
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Friday, September 16, 2005
Monday, September 26, 2005
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Saturday, October 08, 2005
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Wednesday, January 25, 2006
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Sunday, February 05, 2006
Friday, February 17, 2006
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Thursday, March 09, 2006
Sunday, March 12, 2006
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Monday, April 03, 2006
Thursday, April 13, 2006
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Sunday, October 01, 2006
Wednesday, October 11, 2006
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Tuesday, January 09, 2007
Saturday, January 13, 2007
Thursday, January 18, 2007
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Tuesday, March 27, 2007
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Wednesday, June 06, 2007
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Thursday, May 15, 2008
Tuesday, August 11, 2009

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Tuesday, August 11, 2009

My Life, Love??? 10/08/09
At last a post after so long, to a blog where rarely anyone visits....

Why cant I find someone to love and she will love me back in return. I am 27 this year, most of my friends are either married, engaged or already have someone in mind...

Why must I fall in love with XXX who loves me back but is in love with a YYY at the same time.

Is this my fate? To be sad always and see others happy. Why me? I suck in love, dating, courting, finding a gal and all... I hate it. What should I do now?

I keep giving people advice but when i need advice why cant I accept what other people tell me?? Is it because I already know will become of me? I will be alone, miserable while he and the gal live happily ever after. Do I have to believe in that or do I have to choose another path, that will lead me somewhere else?

I have work issues,friends issues, family issues, money issues.... Everyone in the world has these issues, I am no different, am I??? I dont think so...

Leaving is the hardest part.

No one I am comfortable with, is here to support me. For sure I am a man, but cant men be weak. Men must have Ego Blah Blah Blah.... Where is Mine?

The Gals I know so far, are either too far, have just gotten out of an engagement or not ready to be in a relationship yet or scared to be in one as she was scared from too many bad incidents or even are married but not happy with the marriage itself...

I have been to many websites, ask friends to recommend, cruising around but to no avail.. hmmmm....

Should I just give up or just carry on with what I am currntly doing now or do something else??? What EWLse should I do? hmmm.

I have told XXX what XXX needs to know. How i feel, but I not sure if its the reaction i expect from XXX. Seems to me XXX is always forgetting, which XXX admits to it, always tired from XXX work which may drag XXX late late-nights and early the next morning need to rush to work as sometimes XXX woke up late...

I love XXX because of XXX heart, XXX care for XXX family and XXX cuteness.... I am still in the dark about why XXX loves me......... Will i know one day???

I will put this in my blog, for those of you who know me and read this please don't get shocked... This is me....

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 0 comments 10:55:00 AM

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Missing a Friend (15/05/2008)

I am feeling so low ever since. Alot of things have been happening to me. met new friends, found a new job, current job getting more and more relaxing.

now this low feeling is the result of missing a friend. met a new friend not long ago. we chat, laugh and msn often. after awhile things got out of hand and now we chat less, and i get scolded more. even being too caring can be harmful to a friendship. i learnt that the hard way

i am so dumb, childish and stupid..

when will i grow up?

Fadz

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 0 comments 9:05:00 PM

Saturday, December 29, 2007

Just A Few Days To The end Of tHe Year (29-12-2007)

Allo to all who read this, today is just another day in my life. Only a few more days are left before 2008. to one and all i would like to wish a Happy New Year and best wishes for the coming years. May it be as good as this year or even better.

:)
Fadzly

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 0 comments 10:34:00 PM

Wednesday, June 06, 2007

MY Uni/Exgf Dream on 05/06/07
To Reader,
Last night I had one of the strangest dreams. I went to this University in Cairo I think with my ex gf. When we went there, we were suppose to go to the main auditorium hall lah. but before that we were suppose to put our bags in a closet in a particular room. we went into the room and was surprised to find the closet way was blocked by piles of books and papers. we asked the people in the room how are we going to get to the closet. he answered you have to climb on top of the piles of books and papers to reach it. without delay i and my ex gf took off our slippers and climbed onto the piles of books and papers to reach the closet. once there, we open the door, hung our bags inside and made our way back to the exit of the room. after we exit the room, we walked to the auditorium door. just before reaching the door, i accidently tripped my gf and she stumbled to regain balance. once she is stable back on the two feet she turned around and scolded me than she walked away from me in anger heading outside of the University and into the desert. i followed her and tried to explain to her it was an accident. she didnt listen and walked even faster while mumbling something. when i finally caught up with her, i grabbed her arm to stop her but she tripped over some stones on the ground and scratched her feet. the scratches at her feet were bleeding abit and she turned around and scolded me even more furiously this time. the shrugged me off and ran into the crowds. by this time i think it was after 8pm.. as i ran after her, i looked around at my surroundings, i realise i was walking through a cemetary. there were many small humps on the ground with tablets in each one of them. i think these were the graves of young kids. i thread carefully while saying excuse me when i pass each hump...... after that i woke up... pheeeew what a dream.... Fadzly

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 0 comments 1:03:00 PM

Sunday, April 01, 2007

1st April 2007,

As usual suppose to run but last minute the other party cancel due to last minute events on her side. sigh. what a boring sunday/weekend again. met new friends online and been chatting with them since yesterday. friends the more the merrier. i hope so. thanks to all who care

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 0 comments 9:13:00 PM

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

27th MArch 2007,
MY HEART IS BROKEN AGAIN, INTO A ZILLION PIECES, BUT I AM NOT FEELING AS BAD AS BEFORE. I GUESS AM TAKING REJECTION BETTER THAN BEFORE. I WILL TRY MY VERY BEST TO GET OVER IT AGAIN.. THANKS FOR THOSE WHO HAVE SUPPORTED ME ALL THIS WELL

BELIEVE IN ME,

TAKE CARE ALL.
FADZLY

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 0 comments 10:08:00 PM

Sunday, February 11, 2007

A RelaxingSunday <11feb07>

Olla to all.

Today is just a relaxing day for me.
Stay home, maybe go out buy some groceries later, thats all.
Actually planned to go for a run later but most of my friends say not free.
So maybe next week will go for a run.

plans... thats all i can do.
whether it goes as planned or not thats a different question.
must we have plan b all the time???
or just live with it when your 1st plan fail......

well overall it was a good week.
had ups and downs. some bad/good decisions
thanks to all who contacted me, chat with me and surprised me....

all the best to all..
:)

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 1 comments 5:22:00 PM

Thursday, January 18, 2007

hi all ( or anyone)
just an entry to past the time

i fell in love and fell flat on my face. i did stuff that people say i crazy. i hurt people like nobodys business. i lost a friend because of my stupidity, selfishness, my ego and my self-centeredness....

why am i so 'swei'(unlucky)(jinxed)

i really hate myself, everything about myself i hate. from top to bottom all i hate. i have everything to hate and nothing to love. i fell in love and end up hating to love again. making mistakes is my habit. i hate making it but i always do. some mistakes are repeated.....

keep saying sorry when i wrong people. to me i know saying sorry means nothing. the mistake has been done. no turning back. you can only hope and pray they forgive u and forget about it and carry on with life.

i cant carry on with my life...

do u think ending of life will do any good???

is it just an excuse to escape from it all???

will anyone regret that they did not get to know me better???

will anyone cry for me???

will anyone even care to show up at my funeral or even remember who i am???

fadzly? who ar? dont remember leh...

would anyone give me a second or another chance to redeem myself????

all questions... no answers.... or are they meant to be unanswered.???

ONLY HE KNOWS........

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 2 comments 10:53:00 PM

Saturday, January 13, 2007

Lost A Friend Because of MY Silly Mistakes (130107)

Today i had to apologize once again because of my selfish self centred mistakes.
How i wish i could turn back time so that i will try not to do the mistake and make things right again. i will try to learn from this and go on with my life again.

its so hard for me to go on. i really lost faith in love. i dont want to do it again.
falling for a girl is very very difficult for me. i am not sure how am i going to go about doing it again. i really hate myself. low self esteem is my worst enemy...

will i ever find the right ONE? i will try to be more quick to react when i like a girl. i hope

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 0 comments 11:05:00 PM

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

today is the day i found out, the girl i like is starting to like someone else. what a disappointment. i kept in contact with her all this while and she never tell me. sms her didnt reply. called her didnt pick up. reason: busy with school, out with family, last minute outing with friends.... blah blah blah... all excuses. i really hate excuses. why must she say this to me
after i have told her i liked her more than a friend and she still avoid me and lie to me. i just wanted a chance to restart again with her. but she say no.
she still can say be friends only. after i told you i love u??? i dont think so. well this is really goodbye than. really hate this feeling but thats my life than i guess. goodbye. thanks for nothing and for making me lose faith in love

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 0 comments 11:31:00 PM

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

At Last A Blog! ( 30-10-06 )

This will by my first blog in awhile. I had always wanted to Blog but guess was either too busy or too tired. All excuses. I really am tired of excuses. I dont care whether the reasons are valid or not, it is still an excuse. Especially this one girl I knew. Everytime I ask her something thru sms, she will either reply late or never reply untill I ask her again than she will maybe reply. I really hate her for this. But I try to forgive and forget cause I kind of 'like' her. I guess people change. I am not afraid to say her name cause I know she will not have the time to come to my Blog or even go online. All excuses! Her name is xxx. Someone I knew from friendster whom I thought could be the one for me. But it was not meant to be. You can be busy, or tired or forgetfull but don't expect me to believe that you are busy, tired or even forgetfull 24 hrs a day 7 days a week. That's a bit impossible for me to believe. If you can be than I salute you. The last straw for me was when I asker her, thru sms if I said I loved her, what would her reply be. I sent her this message the night before. OK she was asleep at that time. I waited till the next morning when she woke up, which was around 6am+, for her reply. I didnt get any reply. So I decided to ask her again, but this time i said that she might be too busy or forgot to reply or still thinking about the question. She replied to this sms saying she is still thinking about it. Untill this present time and date I have not received her reply. The night after she replied she was thinking about it, I sms her telling her i am assuming the worse and she doesnt love me and said my goodbyes. Still No Reply! I was a bit mad that time, so I sent her another sms saying I hate her and I will not be contacting her anymore. And Still No Reply to Any of My SMS. Well fine than. I give up on her. Till this day I have not received any SMS from her, or message from anywhere or a call from her. Dont expect a call from me too. If you guys think I should call her and ask the reason, Sorry xxx. Guess you will be happier without me Goodbye xxx.

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 0 comments 10:36:00 PM

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Just A Day ( 11-10-06 )

Well today just a normal day, woke up, went to work, finished work and went back. On the way back saw things that I normally see everyday. And everyday I will feel the same thing. Couples holding hands while walking, Couples hugging each other on the escalator and more. I will start to think, thats nice huh? To have someone to be with, to hug, to hold. Than I will compare with My Life. Alone with Few friends and NONE close enough that i can Open Up to. Why is that? Am I thinking Too much? I think I am thinking too much. Thats All I do when I have nothing to do. Well nothing else lah

...........:(

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 0 comments 10:49:00 PM

Sunday, October 01, 2006

Well hi to all who visit my site,

Thanks for visiting my site. I usually have nothing much to update here except if something really good or bad happen on that day. Nowadays nothing much is happening in my life.

As now is the fasting month, i trying my best to not over exert myself in all I do. I dont play badminton on tuesdays, wednesdays or fridays like usual. Try to go back home as soon I finish work to break my fast. and try to get as much rest as I can. This is the first time I fast and I had to work at the same time. It was difficult at first but I think now I am getting the hang of it. work goes on as usual. Fasting doesnt mean I have to rest or sleep whole day. I still have to go to wor, work and then come home from work and do what I normally do everyday fasting or not. The only difference I feel during the fasting month is that i get more tired than if I am not fasting. Well I guess my body is almost used to it by now.

Well thats all for now. See ya when i see ya

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 0 comments 9:59:00 PM

Thursday, September 14, 2006

My Bad DAy 14-09-06
I really had a bad day today, Suppose to meet xxx after work, was really physiqued up to meet her after a long time since i last saw here. at around 530pm she asked me where i am so i replied i still at work. she replied "still have go ou?".
then she asked me whether is it ok if a friend of her come along. in my mind "ah? thought we going out just me and u. sigh. should i tell her i mind? oh no.... well i replied to her that we dont meet today since she is with her friend and also later around 8pm she have a CC meeting so i feel its a bit rush. she keep asking me why and i just keep quiet for while

at last i old her i just wanted to meet her only thats all and say it may sound selfish but thats me.

she is now angry or something like that with me

i dont blame her

i am the one to be blamed.

cos i am amiserable, selfish and a f**ck up person

signing off
fadz

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 0 comments 10:48:00 PM

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

Long Time No Blog 090806
Well it has been a while since I wrote anything here. Well since not many people come visit here, why must I write here often? Ok then. Life so far has been ok for me. Met new people, lost a few people. Nothing outstanding happening though. Work was as usual. Made A lot of mistakes. Trying to remedy my mistakes but it seem impossible. Hope I can stabilize my work attitude and try improve it as much as possible. I really have a lot to learn in my work area. I hope I am trying my best in improving myself there. Thanks to those who have helped me and believed in me. To those toes or feat I have stepped on, I am so sorry.

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 0 comments 9:37:00 PM

Thursday, April 13, 2006

Coffee?? (130406)
Today after work,I went for coffee with a group of friends. I learnt alot from the session. I dont know why but I feel down but refreshed at the same time. The topics chatted are very different from usual. Some are depressing, some are informative and some are shocking. To me that is. The topics for example are, relationships, marriage, prospects in life, and changes. All of these need to be thought thru thoroughly first. Nothing is simple in life from now onwards. Last but not least, I LOST a friend today. Not LOST as in passed away, but not contacting anymore. I guess you loose some, you win some. But I RARELY win....

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 1 comments 8:56:00 PM

Monday, April 03, 2006

Friends ( 030406 )
What are friends for? To have someone to talk to? To have someone to care about? What? I know a lot of people from different parts of Singapore and Malaysia too. We only say hi, bye never talk much. For me I work 5 1/2 days alternate Saturdays. In my office there are only me and 2 gals. The positions of our tables make it inconvenient to chat. So communication is brought down to a minimum. after work i would say bye to them and make my way to the bus stop to go to the MRT while listening to my MP3 player. If that day I do not msg anyone, no one will msg me. Why do I always have to initiate a conversation or a msg. Why cant someone else start the msg or conversation 1st? Well I guess some1 has to start something. "The tree wont move if nothing is shaking or blowing at it" in malay is "Pokok tak bergoyong kalau tak di goncang"

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 0 comments 9:02:00 PM

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Dream of 120306
Yesterday night I had a very strange dream. A dream that would never happen in real life, I am sure of that. I and my X-gf had a baby together, we were married and living fairly well. I was carrying the baby; I think he was a few months old only. I and my X were crossing the road, there was no vehicle around but we stopped at the middle road divider. I adjust my arm because I think the baby was slipping. While adjusting, the baby cried and said "be careful don't drop me". I was surprise then. Hehehe. Then I was in another scene. It was under 1 of the blocks where I used to play basketball nearby. A few of my RSS friends were sitting there. I approached them. To my surprise I only recognize 1 of them Kim Long. Hehehe. I asked him where the rest is and he said "there! They all playing basketball. Cannot see ah?" When I turned my head to see them, I woke up and heard my alarm clock ring at around 0615am. hehehehehe

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 0 comments 8:05:00 PM

Sunday, March 12, 2006

Lost *100306*
Well I think I really lost it. GoodBye Edwin. Wish you all the best in your life, with Rina and also in your studies. To those of you who are reading this blog, treasure what you have with your friends and your loved ones before its too late and try as best as you can to keep the trust and love between each other. Don't lose it. Once lost its hard and almost impossible to gain back. I learnt it the hard way. I lost something that I took for granted and i truly regret it now. Now I can only hope for the best but this lost will haunt me for the rest of my life........

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 0 comments 2:00:00 PM

Thursday, March 09, 2006

Loner 080306
At least now I know why I don't have many friends. Because I backstab and create company politics. Well that's life I guess. Can this be changed? Hmmmm. I don't think so. I am meant to be a loner. No one to talk to. No one to trust... Well as some people say I deserve it I deserve it loh. I know what I have done to deserve it. I can never change back what I have done wrong. People will say move on Fadzly. Move on? For what? What do I have to look forward to? Who am I doing it for? I only know only HE understands my situation and no one else. So from now on I will be alone and live this life till I die..........

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 1 comments 7:38:00 PM

Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Badminton *280206*
Today I played badminton as usual. Do I have to sigh Everyday? Why cant I just laugh or smile most of the time. I know life has its ups and downs, from what I can see its mostly down. Name me one thing that shows the upside of life is coming...............still waiting. Even playing badminton now doesnt make me feel good. Tomorrow I will be doing OT, my mood will be even worse, especially before and during the receiving. I hate this feeling, I really do. Nothing can cheer me up. Nothing. As u all know my friendship with Edwin has been disolved. i am too tired of try my best to make up for what I have done. There's a malay saying that goes " Nasi Dah Jadi Bubuh". The rice has become porridge. Its an irreversable thing. I have already apologize to him and hope things will be back to normal but not at all. So from now on I will do all I can to avoid him physically at work and try not to communicate with him at all. Since theres no feeling of friendship between us, why should i do all the worrying when the other party doesnt give a shit for what I have done for him. If he still remembers what we did in our Poly Life maybe he will understand. But I doubt so he will. I have known him since poly and helped him then. He usually hangs out with the malay guys. Why? Because the chinese guys dont want him near them at all. huh. Since now he got to start a new with his chinese friends at work, he forget about the may guys liao. Thats life. once u have what u want, you forget about who are the ones who helped you get it. Goodbye Edwin. Hope I dont talk to you or have any contact with you at all. You Ass!

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 0 comments 11:20:00 PM

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Today I played badminton with my colleagues as usual. I feel good today when I was playing, better than all the other times. I think today was my best game. The only bad feeling I had was when I was playing with Edwin. When I played with him its like no chemistry, no teamwork like that. That's the only regret I had today. I rather partner with ANYONE else other than him. The feeling I have when I played with him was very negative. Next time please be reminded not to let it happen again. Asking him out would be a no no too. The only time I want to go out with him is lunch that's all. Going back also will be different from now on. Unless the rest are going together than I will follow if not neehh. No Thanks. Tom my OT. Wish Me Luck.....

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 0 comments 10:55:00 PM

Friday, February 17, 2006

Disappointment Part 2 (170205)
Today I was suppose to go Karaoke with a group of friends. But it was canceled last minute. I didn't even know about it until I finish work. The other friend who is suppose to go also didn't know anything. Edwin is the only person who knew, but didn't inform me or Daniel. Until I asked than he told me. Even though than, he like don't want to say like that. Why cant Edwin tell me or Daniel that its canceled? The next time? Will there be a next time?

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 0 comments 10:40:00 PM

Sunday, February 05, 2006

A Friend 030206
A friendship has been damaged a few days ago. It all began when I did something that I was not supposed to do. On that day I real feel very bad and I needed to tell some1 the problem but I didnt dare to tell the person straight in the face, instead I told some1 else. This person that I have a problem with found out about it. I dont know how he found out about it but I could only guess. After he found out he kept avoiding me and ignoring me for quite some time. I keep asking him why is he acting like so. At last he told me that he found out I talk bad about him behind his back. Now he say he cant trust me anymore. I really didnt expect this outcome. This was the 2nd time. The 1st was a secret that really slipped my tongue. The 2nd time is worse. Well i think i really lost it this time. I dont care if he blame me for what I have done. I deserve it. He say next time just go straight to him if the problem concerns him, dont go to any1 else. Even after he says that i feel he is still avoiding me. I dont know what to do now. So i try to not think too much about it but I have to write here. After i apologize to him, he told me no need to msg him so often. He say dont be a gay like that. Wah. Well. Whatever you want to say it's up to you. Dont care liao. Friends are friends that's all. I have myself to think about. If you want to avoid me its up to you. I dont care liao. Waste my time and mood to think about it. Edwin if you are reading this, i apologize again. If you think I act like a gay than so be it. I dont care. I just want you to know i treasure friendship very dearly. I will do anything morally possible for a friend. I will try to avoid you as much as i can. No use i smile at you and you frown back at me or no expression at all. Friends are friends only. You take care. This time no sigh too. :-)

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 0 comments 2:09:00 AM

Karaoke 030206 Today i went out with friends for Karaoke. I didnt know why i wanted to go, i just feel i need to go. I dont want to go home so early since my previous appointment was canceled. The Karaoke was a last minute thing. I feel bad when i told them i want to go. We only had 1 car to fit 6 person. 2 in front, 4 behind. Behind was very squeezy. If i didnt go, they would be more comfortable. I hope they dont mind. I did enjoy the session some what. Thanks guys. Even if i didnt sing as well as any of them, hope they dont mind. Thanks again. No sigh today.

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 0 comments 2:02:00 AM

Tuesday, January 31, 2006
Out With Friends (300106)
Today I went out with a group of friends. They asked me out for a drink . Alcohol lah. But I dont drink. I feel OK at first but after awhile I feel awkward, as some of them say "you dont drink, gamble or smoke, you come here for what?" and my reply was just for fun loh. Than since i am not gambling with them, some of them ask me to shhh whenever Iget too noisy. Sigh. Was I wrong to go out with them. I think it was a bad idea going out with them just now. but i did learn how they gamble and what type of pubs or clubs are there. There are pros and cons i guess. better luck next time i guess. Sigh. I guess I will rarely write something positive in here.

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 0 comments 12:46:00 PM

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

Dubai 240106
There's a job opening at Dubai. At first I thought of going, but after my boss said that the person must be a jack of all trades, I have second thoughts. If I want to go I must be good in steel, concrete cube and tile tests, maybe more. And the person will go somewhere in June, which is also the month where CPG will be moving to its new location. Too many decisions to make, so little time to make the decision. Someone is encouraging me to go; at least I have 1 supporter. Sigh. From my point of view, the prospects are good, but to master so many things that would take years of hands on practice, huh. A bit impossible. I only worked in CPG for 2 months plus. To go or not to go? That,s the question.

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 0 comments 11:26:00 PM

Loneliness 240106
Today I feel loneliness is my partner for life. I have friends but not close I feel like I lost a lot of people that I hold dear to my heart. Either I have offended them in one way or another or they are too busy. To some loneliness is a blessing after a hard day at work, but not to me. It's a torture. Slowly killing my mood on that day. I feel like I am a nobody. Nobody knows me. Or even know I am around. At my workplace, my most dreaded time is lunch time, as I am one of the few muslims working there, I feel bad when the rest have to find a place that sells halal food so that I can eat with them. Sigh. What do I have to do? This is the only place I can let out what I am feeling, where almost no one comes to visit.

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 0 comments 11:25:00 PM

Saturday, January 14, 2006
This will be my 1st blog for this year.
Happy belated New Year to all those who visited me here.
As most of you dont know, i have begun my new job, as an engineering assistant, at a lab called CPG lab at kallang. This involves mostly computer work tabulating concrete cube results. So far i am liking this job. But i think its getting too routine for me. Now i am trying to learn new things so that i wont get bored easily. my colleuges are great bunch of people. a balance of the ying and the yang, if you not what i mean. still looking for the ONE. Wish me luck guys/gals.

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 0 comments 9:16:00 PM

Saturday, October 08, 2005

Flight Dream (061005). I had a dream I was going on a flight to australia i think. I only recognise 2 person that were going with me, they were Mr Haniff and boy. The rest i am not sure. On my way to the airport i realize that i forgot to bring my snow shoe. I said Ahh Nvm ah. When i reach there, we were suppose to go to the waiting room. The waiting room was a special 1. Its like a class, a small classroom filled with car seats, with individual seat belts. Once every body is seated, its like the room is on wheels or something, it moved towards the airplane. The seat belts are not on yet. The side was like a roller coaster side. Half way through, the seat belts are worn on automatically. I was surprised. Why ah? Then the room started to move vertically down and up over something. The feeling was great. Just like a rollercoaster. It felt so real. I held on my seatbelt as tight as i can. Ok we reach the place already. We boarded the plane. All smiling. We put on the seatbelts and the plane started to move. For me i have been on a flight before so i know how it felt like to fly, the feeling was the same in my dream. Great! Then i Woke Up.

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 0 comments 11:23:00 PM

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Disappointment (280905)
Today is one of my disappointed days. Why you ask? This is why. I won tickets for an event called Flaunt at club MOMO held by Perfect10 on thursday 290805. I dont have that many friends who go clubbing or these type of events. I asked two group of friends. The first group sounded excited at first but after awhile they decided not to go cause they say they are working the next day. . Sigh. To me its just an excuse. The second asked me when was it when I told him the date he kept quiet and no responce till now. Sigh. I dont think there will be a next time. The second disappointment is my second application for a teaching position has been rejected. Sigh

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 0 comments 8:05:00 PM

Monday, September 26, 2005

The Run Dream (230905)
I and my family have this shop selling food in bugis street. It was getting late, so we closed our shop. There were still people around but they were buying from the shop beside us not buying from us. So ok. The came the next scene. It was the next day I think. I was running in a marathon or something. I was with my friends in NS coy, echo coy. One of my officers, Jia Jie, was falling behind. He told me he cant go on. I even put his arm over my shoulder to support him and we walked all the way to the finish line. The route was through a town. Many brick walls and pavements. Once we reach the turning point there was a stage where we need to sign something or what. Then we saw a train, like the 1 at the zoo, full of foreigners. They were staring at us. On the form I cant see anything clearly, Jia Jie was fine by then. Thats the end and I woke up. Weird dream huh? Dont know what it means. But I like this dream

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 1 comments 11:34:00 AM

Friday, September 16, 2005

Friday 160905
I had a dream a few nights ago. I was in a cinema, my RSS friends and I were suppose to watch The Maid, but I think it was not showing The Maid. It was showing a fat guy slidding down a slope on his tummy. Then everybody started to laugh. A girl was sitting on my left. She asked me do I live her. And I said not yet. Huh? What does that mean. I simply dont understand what the dream meant. The girl who asked me the question was non other than ......Maggie Lye. Strange. I thought i had forgotten about her, but I think deep inside my memory she's still there, haunting me. She cant do it in reality so she does it in my fantasy. Most nights I dont dream, but when i dodream, the are strange once.

Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 0 comments 9:53:00 PM

Sunday 240705

I had a dream. I dreamt I was a teacher, teaching ice age or something. The students were talking while I was teaching. I cant take it any longer so I shouted at them and started to throw the table and chair nearest to me. Then there was silence. After that Mr Bala, my RSS principal, was there to give me his contact number or something with 3 booklets. Then I calmed down and decided to explain to the students that I was new and decided to get to know them more first. After another scene, one of my collegues asks me do I know how to fill up the gameboy form. ha?


Fadzly set up the umbrella @ 0 comments 9:39:00 PM

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